You side with Satan
I can lift a fully-grown horse above my head, I can hold my breath for 10 minutes, maybe more. To settle a wager with the Son of God, I once ate a pound of P.B. Fouke’s strongest badger poison and ran a mile in the nude. I cannot feel pain, and I can see for two miles or more without lenses. No man can kill me. I have beaten a man of every creed in formal combat, including a Turk and a Christian Zombie. A medical doctor and two priests have written and signed a document confirming that I am evil.
Hmu bro - let’s do evil 2gethr.
No homo. (sapiens)
Not satisfied with this candidate? Choose another!
Amalythia, Priestess of the Nine Realms, High Witch of the Swamp
L.O.R.A.X.
Naunet, Lost Child of the Nile
Phillip Jaruzelski, Wererat
Raul, the Specter Who Haunts Ricky’s Outspokin Tires
“Cool Ghoul” Ramona Saunders
Satan
The Thing Which Dwells Beneath Your Bed
Vernon Maladaise, The Poker
